AUTISM AND COMMUNICATION

Lungamhlongo
7 min readApr 26, 2023

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HOW TO TEACH YOUR AUTISTIC CHILD SPOKEN LANGUAGE

DISCLOSURE: This post contains affiliate links

Autism is a neurological disorder that impairs the ability of the individual to Communicate, Interact, and Socialize.

These three above-mentioned factors are what make a life for people with autism difficult. Today, however, we are going to look at one factor: communication. Why communication?

Because communication is the golden key. Communication affects the other two and involves speech and spoken language. What this means is that if communication is improved, interaction and socialization would automatically align.

But what is spoken language?

Well, spoken language is what we use to convey our message from one to another, either by words or signs.

Children and adults with autism, on the other hand, have difficulty communicating because they often don’t understand spoken language, and this is not because they are deaf, but it’s the understanding/interpretation part that is an issue.

A child may hear that they are being spoken to but due to the inability to understand, they end up being non-responsive and you’d think they are deaf or worse, rude.

See it like this: Imagine if you were trying to communicate with someone in your own language and they spoke in their own, and the two of you can’t understand what the other is saying because of the language barrier.

One thing’s certain, communication would be impossible. Why? Because no one understands the other one but neither of you is deaf, the problem, however, is the language or spoken words.

Now, to understand the other person’s spoken words or language, you’d first have to learn a few basic words. This is also the case with children with autism and I am going to show you how to do just that.

How to teach your autistic child spoken words

Start from the beginning by teaching them the words you use every day like ‘sit’, ‘stand’, ‘sleep’, etc. After they have learned these words, try to CONJUNCT, or CONNECT or LINK them with something that will cause them to remember the words.

Example: my son has very dry lips like they are forever dry, and it doesn’t matter which season it is. So, I always have Vaseline handy to apply every hour or so.

Now, because I knew that this lip-applying routine was going to be a part of our lives for a very long time, I taught him the ‘Vaseline’ word first. After that, I taught him what it was for (it was to moisturize his lips). He now knew two things: the Vaseline and its purpose.

The next step was to teach him where to find it and to make this easier for him, I kept it in our kitchen cupboard in plain sight where he would recognize it the second, he opened that cupboard door.

Now, to put this in a sentence

I have Vaseline which I keep in my kitchen cupboard to moisturize my son’s lips. Now, for him to understand what I say to him, I would say, “Okuhle” (that’s his name). There’s a reason why I start by calling his name first.

For eye-contact purposes. Remember, people with autism spectrum disorder don’t do eye contact at all and it plays a major role in learning language and spoken words.

And the lack of eye contact makes teaching a child language very difficult because children mimic, and they do so by watching what others are doing and copying it. This mimicking ability stems from having eye contact.

Do you know that you can tell what a person is saying by simply watching how their lips move as they speak? It’s actually called lip-reading. It’s another thing that helps non-autistic children speak faster because they read lips. And if you noticed, before they opened their mouths to speak, children first sort of made shapes and inaudible sounds before uttering words.

If the child wanted to say “mama”, you’ll see the way their mouth moved before actually hearing them. So, I also call out his name first to make sure I have his attention.

After I have his attention, I would then say, “Go and get the Vaseline in the cupboard so I can moisturize your lips”. Yoh! You are probably wondering why I don’t just tell him to get the darn Vaseline. There’s a reason why I don’t say that which sounds pretty easy, right? But it’s not easy for an autistic individual who is still in the learning process.

Here’s why

Remember, we have our word ‘Vaseline’ which I’m trying to teach my son, right? Then I have the “where I keep it” and the “what it is for”. Now, these two conjunctions or connectors help him remember what Vaseline is.

But if I just say, “go and fetch the Vaseline”, the only words he’d remember are ‘go’ and ‘fetch’ and then be dumbstruck mid-way because go fetch what? Why? Because the important word is not connected to anything.

It needs to be linked with something that would serve as a “trigger” for him to remember what Vaseline is in the first place.

Even if I say “Okuhle, go and fetch the Vaseline in the cupboard”, it’s still not enough because I didn’t include the purpose which is the trigger.

Therefore, even if I don’t want to use Vaseline for his lips, but if I want him to learn the word and at least remember it for a while I would then say, “Okuhle, go and fetch the Vaseline in the cupboard to moisturise your lips”.

Remembering the ‘where’ which is the cupboard and the ‘what for’ part, which is to moisturize, prompts him to remember Vaseline.

Here’s another example

For a while, he only associated milk with his cereal, and this was only if he saw his bowl and the cereal on the counter. So, if I wanted to tell him to get me some milk in the fridge it became easy if he saw the associated or linked items first.

One time I was cooking some mashed potatoes for him, and I wanted to add a little milk to make it softer and smoother since he doesn’t chew. I asked him to bring me some milk from the fridge and he just stared at me like what the hell I was even saying to him kinda way.

The only words he understood were ‘go’ and ‘fridge’, the rest just went out the window. Why? He’s never seen me cook mashed potatoes and used milk, but he’s seen me every morning making his breakfast cereal and adding milk to it or making tea and adding milk to it.

To him, milk was for tea and his cereal only and if you wanted him to get it for you, there would have to be one of the two things I just mentioned as a trigger for him to remember what milk is and where we kept it.

Sound like a lot of work, right?

Hell, yep, it is. But why this long process? It’s simple. When you deal with an autistic child or adult whom you still need to start from scratch to teach, shortcuts won’t cut it for you.

It’s either this long and cumbersome process or nothing because, in autism, autistic individuals don’t learn what we teach, but we teach what they learn.

Also, it is because people on the spectrum have what we call mind blindness. I once touch-based on mind blindness here when I explained some characteristics of autism.

Let me provide an example of how mind blindness works using both my son and milk to illustrate. Now, in all his autism life, we’ve always bought the same brand of milk at the same supermarket.

Mind blindness explained

The packaging of our milk is light blue and white and by now my son knows this, and we’ve never kept it in another container before. We always keep it in the box until it is finished and dispose of the box. And if you were to ask him to get the milk in the fridge he won’t be confused.

But if I were to transfer the milk into another container that my son has never seen me use before and asked him to get the same milk in the fridge that’s in a different container, he won’t be able to recognize it.

Why? Because it is no longer in the container that he’s known it to be in, therefore, his autistic brain fails to recognize that this is the same milk in a different outfit.

But why? Because the brain registered the initial outfit as the container of the milk and the second that outfit changes, it’s not milk anymore even though it may still look like it since milk is white. The brain becomes blind to the milk since it is in a different container and can only recognize it if it remained in its original one, hence the term ‘mind blindness’.

That is why it is very important to always connect the words with something that will help them recognize and remember them. And once their brain has grasped this strategy, then can you start to cut the sentence to “go fetch the milk” or “bring the Vaseline”.

But here’s what I wished I discovered SOONER

It’s another approach that you can incorporate with the strategy I mentioned. Combined with this approach could really save you tons of time, like seriously. My son responds really well to it.

I recently came across it on the net when I was looking for construction toys for him. Whether it’s because he loves phonic sounds and flashy things, I don’t know but I’ll tell you this, this educational program works like a MAGIC WAND for me.

It’s like killing two birds with one stone; your child gets to learn language and read in a way that any autistic child could, even if they are difficult like my son. It’s called Children Learning Reading. I wish I found this maybe five years earlier because I know how much my son would have improved, but better later than never, right?

I got a lot of things later including the knowledge I have about autism and this educational program but that doesn’t have to be you. As a mother of a severely autistic child with ADHC and OCD, I recommend this program. Try it and prevent delays in your child’s DEVELOPMENT and IMPROVEMENT.

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Lungamhlongo
Lungamhlongo

Written by Lungamhlongo

If AUTISM were a language, I would not speak it fluently, but I would be a native speaker of it. https://www.theautismwall.com. https://ko-fi.com/theautismguide

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